Category: Hope

Christianity, Emotional Health, Faith, Gardening, Gratitude, Hope, Marriage, Neighbors, Prayer, Simplicity, Texas, Writing

Just another Sunday…

gregoryjoel

The days roll by much faster than they used to. It’s hard to believe that July is already here. The heat came earlier than usual this year and the yard is littered with dry leaves that have fallen from the Ash trees. I have a feeling that we all need to get used to warmer weather. It seems like every summer makes it into the record books in one way or another. At least there’s a strong southerly breeze this morning. I still have an hour or so of comfort out here on the porch…

It’s difficult to stay in the moment this morning. I get my little IV infusion buddy taken out tomorrow and I can’t wait. It’s been an annoyance for a couple of months now. My days are planned out around when the IV needs to be changed. The thing that really gets me is not being able to work outside. I know I’ve gone on and on about this before but understand that I don’t do well locked away in the house. Besides, the horses need their cookies and I’ve stayed away from the stables for way too long. Jamison and I both could use some long walks again.

The garden, except for the tomatoes and peppers, has surrendered to the heat. After I go to the doctor in the morning I already have my work out there planned. There’s something about working the soil that soothes the soul. I find a lot of peace and a great deal of joy working in the garden. Between the soil, the dogs, and the horses my life is complete!

It’s been busy this week and there’s really no news nor thoughts to share from the porch this morning. Margaret and I shared some time together. My son stayed the night and joined us for a bit, despite the fact he’s not much of a morning person. Life is simple. Life is good.

I skipped church service this morning. I wanted to steal every moment of cool from the porch this morning. When the sweat finally began to roll I headed inside for my morning ritual of daily news. The most beautiful thing about Sunday is that it’s a slow news day. I’m grateful. Everyone needs a day of rest.

I hope this finds you all well. I’m so grateful for the people God has placed in my life, whether family, close friends, or readers of these wandering thoughts. I spend a lot of time reading your blogs as well and I’m grateful for our community. May you all have a blessed Sunday!

Christianity, Emotional Health, Faith, Gratitude, Hope, Letting Go, Politics, Prayer, Recovery, Simplicity, Spirituality, Trust, Uncategorized, Writing

The only thing we have to fear…

gregoryjoel

It’s a gorgeous summer morning here on the porch today; a light southerly breeze moves the still cool morning air, reminding me not to think ahead to the afternoon heat. It’s almost the end of June and moments like these become fewer and farther between as the summer progresses.

I ran into an old friend last night that I don’t usually get to see except on Facebook and our annual breakfast on New Year’s Day. We talked for a bit and caught up on personal happenings and the conversation slowly moved to the current state of affairs. We share some of the same political views, most of which concern our incredulity that people could support a man like Donald Trump. Rumor has it that Mr. Trump keeps a copy of Hitler’s, Mein Kampf on his nightstand. I don’t know whether it’s true or not, but it makes sense…

I’ve learned that putting myself in other people’s shoes helps me to understand them better. When I gain a degree of understanding, I find I’m a little more empathic and less self-righteous and judgmental (and believe me, I can be that…). My wife has taught me that better than anyone else. She’s blessed to have the gift of empathy. She often helps me slow down and begin to see someone else’s circumstance and point of view. It’s helped me be more like the man I want to be.

I guess that’s why I’m not as harsh to those with opposite views anymore. I’ve tried to put myself in their place, to understand why they feel and act (and vote) the way they do. As I’ve grown older it makes more sense. I have moments when I, too, wish for the ‘way things were’. Nostalgia creeps in and the old times seem much better (and simpler), but life goes on. My Dad used to tell me that the only thing consistent about life is change…

The funny thing about nostalgia is that not much of it is true. Reality is always different from my memory. I tend to romanticize the good times, and rationalize, justify, and minimalize the not so good times – especially when they were the result of my decisions. I’ve learned that I’m not unique in that regard. Waxing nostalgic and ignoring reality is a common practice.

I’ve been hearing this phrase repeat itself over and over in my head lately – “Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it” (George Santayana). In recovery rooms they have a similar saying – “When I forget my last high I’m in danger of the next one”. So, I guess I’m not surprised when life seems to cycle over and over. In our collective nostalgia we vote in a Trump just like we voted in a Coolidge and a Hoover.

The good news is that a Roosevelt and a ‘New Deal’ is always on the horizon waiting for me (and us) to accept it. Like Roosevelt said, “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself”. Fear is pervasive in our culture today. Our culture, whether on the right or the left loves to create political, economic, and social fear. It’s no wonder people act the way they do. I do some incredibly dumb things out of fear as well…

The truly ‘Good News’ for me is that most of my fears are unfounded. Common sense tells me not to go around picking up rattlesnakes, but if someone didn’t, there wouldn’t be festivals like the Rattlesnake Round-up in Sweetwater. I’ll still leave that one for others, though.

Today I have faith in a God of my understanding who continually reminds me “Don’t be afraid”, “be still and know that I am God”.  He needs to remind me because I still have my moments. The world can be a scary place, especially if I substitute reality with nostalgia and denial. I know that no matter what happens, God has my back and everything’s going to be okay. That frees me to understand others and to act courageously and love freely. After all, my Rabbi likes to remind me that “perfect love casts out all fear”.

I’m pretty sure the world will go on as it has. History will repeat itself in a continuous, ongoing cycle, and people will long for ‘good old days’ that weren’t all that great. The good news is that it doesn’t have to, but that requires being fearless. I’m so thankful for those that are. I’m thankful that “all I have to fear is fear itself” and that I have freedom to be courageous. Let’s be fearless today…

Beatitudes, Christianity, Emotional Health, Faith, Gratitude, Hope, Immigration, Neighbors, Politics, Poor People's Campaign, Recovery, Relationships, Simplicity, Spirituality, Trust, Uncategorized

Enough

gregoryjoel

“I woke up this morning with my mind set on freedom…” The Justice Choir, Poor People’s Campaign

What a way to start the morning! I woke up early, left my sleeping wife and dogs, and took my coffee to the porch. A little cloud cover and a slight breeze made for an excellent morning to pray and meditate in the cool of the day.

Yesterday was the culmination of the last forty days of the Poor People’s Campaign, A National Call for Moral Revival. Fifty years ago this week, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. led the original Poor People’s Campaign to Washington D.C. I sat and listened to the livestream of the rally in Washington and became incredibly grateful for those that continue to work for justice, peace, and a better life for all people and not a select few.

I have to tell you about a news report about James Comey, the former FBI Director. It seems he was going to Dublin, Ireland on his book tour. Upon arrival he commented to his wife that they should tell the Irish immigration officials they were Canadian. They were ashamed to be Americans in the current world situation. I understand completely. I’m embarrassed by association, but I’m reminded by the Poor Peoples Campaign of the good, decent human beings who strive daily for social and economic equality and justice. They are what I always thought the country of my birth was about.

I’m grateful for the life God has granted me. I’m under no illusions about the advantages of my birth, my family, and even my home, especially when I compare my life to the majority of the world’s population. I live better than most and I know that’s a privilege and a blessing I’ve been given – even when we struggle with health and financial issues. My son, who doesn’t share my spiritual beliefs, asked me once if being poor meant that God thought less of poor folks. It’s a legitimate question. Watch a few minutes of most televangelists and it doesn’t take long to assume that you’re out of God’s favor if you aren’t blessed financially. According to them, you’re just not praying with the right heart. God is a cosmic Santa Claus and he’ll give you everything you ask for if you ask the right way and do the right things. It’s no wonder my son questions such a God! I would, too…

I know that humans have an innate ability to make a mess of things. I know from personal experience that I can be pretty good at creating havoc in my life and the community in general. I know that power, class, and social structures are created by fallible men and I can’t blame a loving Higher Power for their, or my place in the system. However, I am obligated by my relationship with the God of my understanding to speak out against economic and social injustice in the world. I guess that’s why I enjoyed the livestream so much. It touched my spirit and invited me to live and love better.

I’ve known poverty, both in the economic and the spiritual sense. Spiritually, my Higher Power calls me to poverty. In Matthew 5:3, Jesus said, “You’re blessed when you’re at the end of your rope. With less of you there is more of God and His rule”. The older versions of his sermon call it being “poor in spirit”. I couldn’t get out of the way until I had nowhere else to go. In recovery programs, it’s called ‘hitting bottom’. I was so poor spiritually that I had no way out of my predicament. If there’s anything to the ‘Prosperity Gospel’, it’s that when I finally recognize my spiritual poverty, I begin to experience God’s grace – and everything is grace – and what a prosperous life it is!

Economically, my wife and I have experienced ‘enough’. We live paycheck to paycheck but there’s always ‘enough’.  That’s what poor people ask for when the march in campaigns and hold rallies. That’s what they cry for when they ask for a return to morality – to live in a society of morals and values that don’t exclude them. Men and their institutions would have us believe in scarcity of resources, time, and money. Yet, God’s kingdom, His way of living, says there’s enough for all His kids. When the Poor People’s Campaign calls for a return to some semblance of morality they are saying ‘enough’ – not only is there enough wealth and resources to go around – they’re speaking to the morals and values we claim to hold dear. They are “speaking the truth to power”.

I’m filled with hope when I see people coming together to ask for ‘enough’ – enough food, enough healthcare, enough justice, enough economic and social equality – for everyone. I’m filled with hope when people take time out of their lives to stand together and try to do what’s right. I’m filled with hope that maybe, just maybe, there’s a tiny chance that the world my grandchildren inherit will be a little better, that they’ll have ‘enough’.

It’s easy to become jaded when I peruse the news as is my daily habit. Then I read about things like the couple in California who started a Facebook campaign to raise $1500.00 to post bond for immigrant families separated by the injustice of Mr. Trump and his cronies. As of yesterday, NPR reported that they’ve raised nineteen million dollars. It’s the largest fundraiser ever on Facebook. Suddenly, I’m not quite as embarrassed by being from America. I’m reminded of Jesus’ admonition to, “Keep an open house; be generous with your lives”. Sometimes, we get it!

This morning I’m filled with hope. I’m so grateful. It’s such a blessing to have ‘enough’…

Christianity, Faith, Family, Grief, Hope, Immigration, Neighbors, Politics, Prayer, Public Policy, Uncategorized

Father’s Day 2018

gregoryjoel

I didn’t spend very much time on the porch this morning, despite the fact it was much more pleasant than it has been lately. Rain came close enough from the south to make for a cool morning. A gentle breeze invited me to stay longer, but I couldn’t. My heart was heavy this morning and I simply needed to retire to my desk to write and journal.

Yesterday was Father’s Day and I want to extend a belated Father’s Day blessing to all fathers out there. I hope you were celebrated and appreciated by the one’s you love. I hope you were able to spend time with your kids, young and old, and enjoy time with family and friends. That wasn’t the case for everyone. Still, I wish a Happy Father’s Day to you all.

My wife got out of bed before I did and left the CBS Morning News on when she went to the porch. When I woke up a short while later, the very first thing I heard was a story about the separation of immigrant families along the southern border of our state. I’ve been following this story closely since it became public knowledge. The more I learn and see, the angrier I get. It’s wrong! It’s evil! I don’t see how anyone with any kind of moral code can remain silent about it!

If there’s anything good to come from such a policy, it’s the growing number of people who are outraged by it. In a culture of divisiveness, anger, and antagonism, it seems to be the one thing people can agree on. Maybe there’s hope for us yet…

I read articles where previous First Ladies, from both ends of the political spectrum, condemn Mr. Trump’s policy of family separation (it’s still impossible to use the words Trump and President in the same sentence without throwing up…). Politicians from both conservative and liberal leanings have equated his policy to Nazi practices and the internment of Japanese-American citizens during World War II.

I had the privilege of celebrating Father’s Day with my wife’s family yesterday while many fathers didn’t even get to see their families because of the corrupt rantings of men like Donald Trump and Jeff Sessions. They won’t even accept responsibility for their evil. They blame it on someone else. They are just doing their job – echoes of Nazi war criminals…

NPR reported the other day that one father had been voluntarily deported to avoid continued separation from his infant son. Four months later he’s still waiting for his son to be returned to him! Not only has the government failed to reunite him with his son, they’re not sure when or where that reunion can take place. I’m not even sure if they know where he is…

I was outraged by a Washington Post report of the long-term damage these kids (and their parents) will suffer as the result of these hateful political games. One pediatrician witnessed a two-year old girl constantly crying and slamming her little fists against the floor because she’s been kept from her mother who came here seeking asylum from neighborhood terror and domestic violence. Such scenes should spark outrage in others as well, regardless of their political leanings or views on immigration.

“As of Thursday, 11,432 migrant children are in the custody of the Department of Health and Human Services, up from 9,000 at the beginning of May. These numbers include minors who arrived at the border without a relative and children separated from their parents.

The policy so far has pushed shelters to their capacity. Administration officials had started making preparations to hold immigrant children on military bases. On Thursday, the Trump administration said it will house children in tents in the desert outside El Paso.” (Washington Post.com  June 17, 2018)

I’d like to believe that we, as a people, are better than this. I’d like to believe that we are better than to allow such behavior to go on unchallenged. Seeing the folks who spent their Father’s Day marching on the Texas border or attending rallies against this cruelty gives me hope. Maybe if enough people put aside their partisanship and simply act like human beings, we can effect change. I’d like to think so…

I understand the anger and frustration that led to the election of a man like Donald Trump. What surprises me is that, according to the most recent Gallup Poll, 42% of Americans still approve of him. I must admit that it scares me more than a little bit. Still, I hope that humanity wins out…

So, on this day after Father’s Day, my heart goes out to all the fathers who are separated from their children, especially because of the maliciousness and evil of morally bankrupt politicians. Please know that there are people with you in spirit who striving to do what’s right on your behalf. Be strong. Love and appreciate your families and know you’re loved and appreciated for wanting them to have a better life – just like most of us fathers. Happy Father’s Day…

Christianity, Emotional Health, Faith, Family, Fishing, Gratitude, Growing Up, Health, Hope, Letting Go, Marriage, Positive Thinking, Prayer, Recovery, Relationships, Uncategorized

On Dead-ends and Fishing

gregoryjoel

There’s a steady breeze this morning, making for a pleasant summer morning here on the porch. Margaret is hurting this morning and elected to stay in bed a bit longer leaving me to enjoy the sunshine of the day here in our quiet cul-de-sac by myself. She had two procedures of shots in her back in the last month and the promised relief is nowhere to be found. If anything, the pain is worse. It’s hard to see my wife in pain but she reminded me that ‘nothing ventured, nothing gained’, so it we gave it a try.

My quiet was broken this morning by a large tree-trimming truck pulling a wood chipper as it came down the street. Please keep in mind that we live in a cul-de-sac at the end of a long street. Parking is at a premium here and cars on the street make our little circle even smaller. I noticed the look of panic on the truck driver’s face as he slowed and tried to figure out how he was going to negotiate the situation. He made several attempts, growing more frustrated with each one. It was apparent he was in a bit of a pickle. He sat for a moment, thought about it for a bit and soon his passenger climbed out and positioned himself behind the chipper. The driver, reassured by his guide, took a deep breath, repositioned his truck and chipper and backed down the street and went on his way. Problem solved…

I, like the tree truck driver, find myself driving along a road that seems free and clear, and suddenly I find myself facing a dead-end and I can’t get out. Sometimes I just need to stop trying to turn around on my own and back down the way I came. Since I’m not that great at driving in reverse, I need a guide I can trust to show me the way without backing into all the parked vehicles or tree limbs hanging over the street. Fortunately, I have such a guide and I’m blessed to have family and friends who help me stay on the right road. A lot of folks don’t…

The whole scenario reminded me of my youth and fishing trips with Dad. I was notorious for getting my line tangled on something beneath the water. I’d pull and tug until the line popped and came flying back, creating a tangled mess of fishing line that was impossible to straighten out. My father used to tell me to cut my line when it’s caught on something and I’d avoid a tangled mess. I could put on a new hook and get busy fishing again. I was stubborn and wanted to do it my way, so I didn’t spend a lot of time fishing…

I can still be pretty stubborn, even though I don’t like to think so. I don’t think it’s just a ‘guy’ thing that I don’t like to ask for directions. I like to think, or at least let others think, that I have it all under control, that I don’t need help. I’m like the ‘Marlboro Man’ in the old cigarette ads. I can do it and do it my way. Of course, I forget that the ‘Marlboro Man’ died of lung cancer. Independent, strong, and egotistical has their drawbacks…

I am getting better, though. I trust my guide and not only is it easier to back out of dead-ends, it’s become a little easier to avoid them in the first place. I’m willing to stick to the map and ask for directions if I’m having difficulty. I’m willing (most of the time anyway) to stop when the people closest to me sound out a warning. Heck, I’ve even learned to read instructions before I assemble new purchases. I still have parts left over from time to time but it’s usually because they packed extra ones to begin with. Go figure!

I’m learning to ‘cut my line’ and let go of my need for control over situations. I spend a lot more time ‘fishing’ and a lot less time trying to work out the knots and tangles life throws at me. They’ll work themselves out one way or the other. I’m not responsible for, nor can I control, the outcome so why get all worked up? I cast the line, reel it in, and sometimes I get a really big fish…

It’s time to go in and get to work. I’m sure the tree truck dilemma was no coincidence this morning. I have a project that’s proving itself to be somewhat difficult. I needed a reminder that my Guide never steers me wrong. Who knows, maybe I need to ‘cut my line’ and tackle the problem from a different angle. Either way, I’m going to trust my Guide and follow directions. Like the old Zen proverb, I’m going to “cut wood and carry water” and see what happens…