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Fall Makes an Appearance

Good Morning Everyone! I’ve been seriously lacking in updating everyone on Opal’s Farm over the last month. Fall is particularly busy this year with planting and expansion into the next 1/3 acre of the farm. We’ve made some amazing progress with the help of some dedicated, hard working volunteers and our amazing friend Charlie Blaylock with Shines Farmstand.

All the furrows are mulched!

Fall is a special time of year at the farm. The days are a bit cooler, which makes work all the much easier (and fun!) and the changing season brings new life to dormant summer plants (the tomato pepper plants are loaded). The purple hull peas apparently produce more in the Fall than in the Spring!

Clearing the new section!

The late summer plantings of cantaloupes are going to be ready this week. Jamison the Farm Dog is doing his best and working hard to keep the field mice and river rats from getting to them first.

 The Fall plantings are growing and going. We took the first radishes of the season to market this Saturday. The Japanese turnips and beets should be close behind.

We may be unbelievably busy, but we always have time to enjoy the peace and wildlife Fall brings to the farm. Monarch butterflies are more frequent, the turtles sun themselves more frequently on the banks of the Trinity (unfortunately so do snakes! Don’t worry though: they stay by the river!), and the egrets are everywhere these days.

The okra’s going great!

We’ve also had a beautiful pair of visitors over the last couple of weeks. Two Great Blue Herons have been frequenting the farm. They are truly majestic. They’re the largest herons in North America (and tend to make Jamison a bit curious and bark a lot…) and we feel blessed they’ve chosen to hang out at Opal’s Farm.

We’d like to take a moment to thank the Tributary Café on Race Street. We began selling okra to the café a couple of weeks ago. Last night, they asked us to set up for the Race Street night out hosted by the Riverside Business Alliance. We met some great neighbors and shared the bounty of the farm with many. We now deliver on Wednesday’s to the adjoining riverside neighborhoods for a $2 delivery fee. You can always call the farm to see what’s available and place your order. We’ll have that set up online soon.

As always – we’d love to have you come out to the farm to volunteer or just visit and say hi. You can always donate directly to Opal’s Farm by visiting our website at www.unityunlimited.org or our Facebook page.

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“As long as we keep dividing our lives between events and people we would like to remember and those we would rather forget, we cannot claim the fullness of our beings as a gift of God to be grateful for. Let’s not be afraid to look at everything that has brought us to where we are now and trust that we will soon see in it the guiding hand of a loving God.” – Henri Nouwen

Photo by NO NAME on Pexels.com
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Gratitude in the Time of Loss…

I slept in today. It was 7:30 before I greeted the morning with a cup of coffee and some prayer. The Saharan dust cloud that drifted across the Atlantic Ocean and into the southern United States has left a greyish haze over what would normally be a sunny to partly cloudy day. It fit my mood for the day…

Perhaps the coffee hadn’t kicked in yet. At least that’s what I told myself. The reality is that I’m tired. Grief is tiring. It drains me of all energy and drive, leaving me at times with an overwhelming sadness. Some days I simply feel defeated.

It may be too early in the grieving process to find gratitude in loss, but I’ve learned that gratitude is a powerful tool to change perspective and move forward. I can still be grieving the loss of my son and find the gratitude to move forward. Ironically, when I came in from the porch to check emails, the first three were links to articles on gratitude. I’m not huge on the whole numbers/numerology thing, but when I see or hear something three times I tend to listen. That’s usually when God tries to get my attention. This is what came to mind this morning…

First, what I’m going through is a part of life. Grief is a common experience to us all. Life is about birth and death. Everyone experiences loss. The loss of a child is a particular type of pain. My friend Edgar told me that there is no name for our pain. Someone who loses a spouse is a widow or widower. Children who lose their parents are called orphans. There is no name for people who lose their kids. Perhaps it’s because no one can find words for it.

I’m grateful for the outpouring of love and support from my friends and family. I’m especially grateful for those that acknowledge there are no to offer and not trying to offer comfort other than “I’m here”. Jeremy’s passing has shown me how blessed I am with the amazing people God has put into my life. I’m reminded I’m part of a community. Most importantly, I’m thankful I’ve been allowed to feel what I need to feel, and I don’t have to walk this journey alone.

Secondly, I’m extremely grateful for Opal’s Farm. I’ve always told people about “dirt therapy”. I can now say without a doubt it’s truly therapeutic. Something about seeing the cycle of life, death, and rebirth in a garden centers me. It reminds me I’m part of something greater; that I’m a part of creation. After all, that’s why God created man to live in a garden…

Lastly (for this post anyway), it dawned on me this morning that Jeremy’s passing never caused me a crisis of faith. I’ve never doubted God’s goodness during this time. That’s a big deal. Had this happened several years ago I’m not sure I could say that. My coping systems were flawed then. I probably never would have recognized God’s constant presence and protection. I miss Jeremy dearly, but God didn’t “take him” from me. Instead, He’s carrying me through this time of grief. He helps me be there for my grandkids and those left behind who loved Jeremy so much.

“Ghost” by Jeremy Joel

I know there will be good days and bad days in the coming weeks, months, and even years as grief ebbs and flows. I’m still early in the process and the crash is still coming. Thank God for the people in my life who’ve experienced this special kind of pain and will lead me through the process. I know that gratitude can be found in even the most dire of circumstances if I search diligently enough. For those days when gratitude is elusive God will pick me up and carry me until strength returns and I’m able to walk the path hand in hand with Him again…

Courtesy of KERA/Art and Seek

https://artandseek.org/2020/06/10/remembering-jeremy-joel-artist-friend-father/?fbclid=IwAR3_1TgijHW3iZ65otwVcL3-nopdovKXPekEy0h0pIXIBMMCampHnUianSs

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Father’s Day 2020

It’s been three weeks since my son Jeremy died. I haven’t yet responded to all the calls, texts, and condolence letters that so many of you have sent. I want to personally thank each one of you and will do so in the coming days. I’ve started to several times and found I simply couldn’t yet. This is a kind of grief I wouldn’t wish on anyone.

Today is Father’s Day. It’s not much of a holiday this year. I usually have lunch with my older son (he’s still single ladies), Adrian, and let Jeremy spend time with his children. That’s how life goes. Our kids grow up and have families of their own and days like today are left to them to celebrate with the next generation. As it is, Adrian is on his way to Colorado to deliver Jeremy’s ashes to his mother and spend some time with her. She needs him now more than ever. Still, my children are absent, and my grandkids have no father to celebrate with. My heart is broken. I’ve had better Father’s Days…

Photo by Katy Hulsey

Over the last three weeks there have been many wonderful articles written or shared on the local NPR affiliate about Jeremy the artist. I’ve been so proud of him. To see the outpouring of love and appreciation for his talent and his work warms my heart. I know my son was loved by many. I am grateful for all of it, but it doesn’t talk about Jeremy, my son, and the father of my beautiful grandchildren.

One of the articles mentioned Jeremy’s art as his legacy. Apparently, the author wasn’t as good a friend as he claimed, or he would’ve known that Jeremy’s true legacy was his children. Thank you to all the subsequent writers that acknowledged the kids and Jeremy’s role as a father.

As I’ve sat here at the desk this morning, I’ve tried to put my emotions to paper, but I feel lost. There are no words. Jackson Browne came on my radio today. His words rang in my heart. If I were a better musician and singer, I’d sing this song for Jeremy. He’d get it…

Jackson Brown, For a Dancer

All of this being said, I want the wish a Happy Father’s Day to each of you Dad’s out there. It comes with a caveat – give your kids a hug and tell them how much you love them. Make this day about them. That’s what fathers do…